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The first one took a while to get out.  Like I mentioned in my last post, I only had the smoke and mirrors thought in my head for inspiration and it was past midnight when I wrote it.  The Spike one came very quickly as he always inspires.  The Buffy one was easier because it's only a modified Cinquain.



By Way of Smoke and Mirrors


Stardom
Bloated, Empty
Deceives famished egos
Ephemeral smoke and mirrors
Grandeur




On the Subject of Spike


Vampire
Bloody, tempting
Sauntering through darkness
My unguarded heart enraptured
Timeless



They Call This One Buffy


The Slayer
Strong, Dutiful
Hunting, quipping, eliminating
Consistently guarding her affections
The Chosen




The first two poems are true Cinquain poems.  They consist of 22 syllables and it's not as easy as it looks.  At least for me.  The modified Cinquain is easier to do as the poet is not bound by a rigid amount of syllables.  My titles are long to follow the pattern of my favorite poem by the creator of the Cinquain, Adelaide Crapsey.  It's called "Niagara, Seen on a Night in November".

                                                                   True Cinquain

1 noun/topic
2 adjectives that describe the topic
3 words that express action
4 words that express a feeling
1 word that refers to the title
2 syllables
4 syllables
6 syllables
8 syllables
2 syllables

       
                                              Modified Cinquain

1 noun/topic
2 adjectives that describe the topic
3 words that express action
4 words that express a feeling
1 word synonym that refers to the title

Comments

( {23} Spoke — Speak )
spikesdeb
Jan. 4th, 2009 05:30 pm (UTC)
Oh they're wonderful! I hadn't heard of a cinquain before, but I'll certainly be looking into them now. I actually find that it concentrates the mind wonderfully if you have to stick to a word or syllable limits, like a drabble, or a sonnet.

'On The Subject of Spike' is just exactly him. Very nicely done.
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 06:05 pm (UTC)
Thank you. :) I tend to write more rhyming poetry and I like the freedom of doing it my own way, but you are right, the limits of a structured poem does make you focus.
louise39
Jan. 4th, 2009 06:37 pm (UTC)
A new one!! Interesting way to focus.
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 06:48 pm (UTC)
:) My fevered and tired brain was shot after writing these. But, yeah, it was focused while I was working on them. LOL!
ms_scarletibis
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:15 pm (UTC)
I really liked the By Way of Smoke and Mirrors one.

Hmm...I've never heard of this type of poem. I might give it a shot one of these days. But you know what's really hard? Writing a poem in iambic tetrameter--that will *really* give you a headache (like Robert Frost's A Snowy Evening, I think it's called).
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:26 pm (UTC)
Thank you. :)

Is that the 'miles to go before I sleep' poem?

I'll have to look up iambic tetrameter.
ms_scarletibis
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:29 pm (UTC)
Yeah, that's the one :D
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:39 pm (UTC)
Looked it up. Now I know why the term seemed familiar. When I write poetry freely, it tends to come out like that. Though I'd have to go through my old poems to count the syllables.

I might just try to write one in the strict sense one of these days. :)
ms_scarletibis
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:42 pm (UTC)
I did it once before a few months ago, but all the rhyming as well as the syllable count made it difficult. I'm more a "freestyle" person myself :P
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:51 pm (UTC)
I'm with you. I'm much more a freestyle kind of a girl. I think the best thing about the structured poems is that they hone your skills for writing freestyle. :)
petzipellepingo
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:32 pm (UTC)
I'm not familiar with this type of poetry but I like it!

Vampire
Bloody, tempting
Sauntering through darkness
My unguarded heart enraptured
Timeless

Oh yes, perfect little Spike snapshot.

dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 08:36 pm (UTC)
Thank you. I'm glad you liked it. Spike inspires.
stultiloquentia
Jan. 4th, 2009 09:02 pm (UTC)
petzipellepingo pointed me here.

I love it when people use fandom as an excuse to play with weird-ass, insanely restrictive poetic forms. These are awesome. I'm adding them to my Jossverse poetry masterlist, if that's okay with you.
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 09:06 pm (UTC)
First all, I'm totally floored that she thought they were good enough to pimp. :)

Second, I'm very flattered that you'd want to add them to your masterlist and you are welcome to do so.

:)
petzipellepingo
Jan. 4th, 2009 10:42 pm (UTC)
I told you I liked them.
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 11:16 pm (UTC)
:) That you did. I'm flattered that you would pimp it. Thanks.
xc_runner50
Jan. 4th, 2009 09:04 pm (UTC)
oh I love them, spot on Spike and Buffy.
dawnofme
Jan. 4th, 2009 09:06 pm (UTC)
Thank you, hun.
mere_ubu
Jan. 6th, 2009 12:40 am (UTC)
I'm here from Petzi's rec and so glad to find these. I especially like the contrast between "my unguarded heart enraptured" and "consistently guarding her affections." Lovely stuff!
dawnofme
Jan. 6th, 2009 06:12 pm (UTC)
Thank you. And I LOVE your icon!
tahlay
Jan. 7th, 2009 03:27 am (UTC)
I took an Advanced Composition class last semester and I just about pulled all my hair out trying to write a cinquain that didn't seem lame.
Your's are pretty awesome!
dawnofme
Jan. 7th, 2009 04:09 am (UTC)
:) Thank you. It really was a challenge. But I love a challenge. I'm sure I would have been wanting to pull my hair out if it was an assignment though.
thenewbuzwuzz
May. 1st, 2018 11:28 am (UTC)
Ooh, such an interesting form! I want to try cinquains now. Thank you!
(By the way, are these archived anywhere else, or just here?)
( {23} Spoke — Speak )