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Great! Just Great! Crazy Fic for Numbers Challenge over at [info]nekid_spike

September 11th, 2008 (11:21 pm)
naughty

Spike & I Feel: naughty

Title:  Great!  Just Great!
Author:  [info]dawnofme
Rating:  NC-17
Summary:  Buffybot does Spike's bidding and puts Angel in an uncomfortable position. 
Warnings:  Story is not worksafe and a little kinky.  The banner is worksafe. 
Pairing:  Buffybot/Spike
Word Count:  1623
A/N:  Thank you, </a></b></a>[info]mabel_marsters and </a></b></a>[info]slaymesoftly for the quick beta.  I made a couple of changes after the beta work was done, so all mistakes are mine and mine alone.  I almost didn't do this challenge, because the last time I did a numbers challenge for another community, I also got buffybot.  While I had fun writing my Buffybot/Gavin pairing, I thought I was finished with her.  Then this idea popped in my head and I couldn't resist.  Hope you like.


Larger version of banner, under the cut.





Great!  Just Great!


 Buffy flipped the belt at him again, cracking it like a whip. Angel, looking horrified, bolted to his feet, knocking his chair over. He groaned when he thought of the mess that he was going to have to clean up. His office was an utter disaster.


“Let's play, Angel.” Buffy said, with an eerie, thousand-watt smile plastered on her face. “You like it rough, don't you?”


His jaw dropped and then he snapped it shut. He had no clue what to say to her. She'd just shown up at the Hyperion Hotel, marched into his office and begun acting crazy. She'd given him a firm hug and before he knew what was happening, she'd taken his belt off and begun using it as a whip.


“Look, Buffy, I don't know what's going on, but you just can't come in here and destroy my office.”


“Yes, I can.” She snapped the belt again, knocking his keyboard off the desk. “On your knees.”


“What?”


“Now don't make me angry. You wouldn't like that program.” She shook her head and continued to smile at him.


Angel flinched when she grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him over the desk. In one swift move, she ripped his shirt open, buttons flying everywhere. He was so shocked that he gave little resistance when she shoved him by the shoulders into a kneeling position on the floor.


“We are going to have so much fun, Angel,” she said cheerfully.


As she used the belt to tie his hands in front of him, he could feel himself getting hard, but he took in a deep breath and frowned. “There's something not right about you. You smell different and there's something missing, but I can't quite put my finger on it.”


“No. I'm Buffy,” she said, her eyes getting wide with excitement, “The Vampire Slayer.”


She pushed him so he was flat on his back, pulled his hands over his head and used the loose end of the belt to tie him to the leg of his desk. Angel knew that he shouldn't let her do this to him. If he had a happy moment, his friends-- the world even-- would be in terrible danger.


“I'll be back,” she told him and skipped out of the room.


He knew he could get out of the flimsy belt, so he relaxed and waited for her to return. Not a minute later, she came back to the office, carrying a black duffel bag. He raised his shoulders off the floor to get a better look as she opened it.


He started to struggle when he saw the heavy chains, asking, “What are you doing?”


“It's not real bondage unless there are heavy vampire proof chains involved.” She shrugged, and then began chaining his hands up properly, before he could get free of the belt. “At least that's what Spike says. And Spike is always right.”


“What the hell?” Angel yelled, but he couldn't get out of the expertly done chains.


The sigh that Buffy emitted made him sick to his stomach, but her next words really made him want to hurl.


“Spike is so hot. He's perfect really.”


Angel kicked and bucked, but she had him good. In quick order, Buffy added chains to his feet and just as he started to yell out for help, she got a strip of duct tape over his mouth.


She stood up to inspect her handiwork. “That's much better. Spike will be so proud. He warned me that you never shut up.” She glanced around, then bent to dig in her bag. “Now where did I put that cock ring?”


Angel's eyes widened and he tried to shout through the duct tape, but then he remembered the call that the gang had gotten. Since the job had to be done in the daylight, he'd stayed behind to man the phones. They would be gone for another hour at least. There was no one to hear him, even if he could scream.


He narrowed his eyes at her, scrambling in his mind to come up with a logical reason why Buffy would be doing this or why she'd say that Spike was perfect. He struggled again when she pulled out a clear plastic cock ring.


Buffy knelt beside him and rubbed his cock through his trousers.


“That feels good, doesn't it? I've got to get you nice and hard.”


Angel closed his eyes to the glorious sensation of Buffy's hands on him, trying to will himself to stay flaccid. He usually enjoyed toys during sex and owned a cock ring of his own for when he was lonely, but Buffy's strange behavior scared him. He had a bad feeling about all of this.


With a cute little pout, she said, “Having a hard time getting it up? Spike thought that might happen. He's says it’s what happens when you get old and don't use it often.”


She slowly undid the zipper and pouted again.


“Boxers? Spike doesn't wear any underclothes and that's sexy. You are not sexy. It's a good thing that I don't need to be turned on for this.”


He bucked and tried to scream again when she reached in with her cold hands and pulled him out.


Cold hands?


Angel glared at her, doing his best to concentrate and ignore her hand pumping up and down his member. There was no heartbeat! But she wasn't a vampire.


Despite this new revelation, the sensations she was causing were starting to get to him. He fought it as long as he could, but soon, he was ‘rising to the occasion'.


She smiled at him and let out a giggle. Then she stretched the cock ring and shoved it none-too-gently down his shaft. He couldn't look, but he felt engorged and painfully stiff. He vamped out and tore at the duct tape with his teeth.


“Mrph, Spligh, fudtc.” Finally, the tape ripped in half. “Spike!”


Buffy rose to her feet and dusted her hands off. “There. All done. I don't know what I would have done if my hand wasn't enough to do the job. Spike says my mouth is for him only.” She then tilted her head and studied him. “Spike was right. You are not as big as he is, but close.”


“Did I hear someone call my name?” The platinum blond vampire said, stepping into the room.


“Get me out of this!” Angel roared.


Spike chuckled, then doubled over in laughter.


“This is not funny!


“Oh, but it is,” Spike said, and then turned to Buffy. “Don't you think so, pet?”


“Angel is ugly and his hair sticks up funny. And now, his cock does, too.”


Spike went into another fit of laughter and hugged her. “This is just perfect.”


“I know that's not Buffy. What is that thing?” Angel snarled, still twisting and trying desperately to get free.


“Angel, meet the Buffybot.”


“A robot? You are insane!”


“You were fooled for a few minutes,” Spike said with a shrug and then gave Angel a smug smile, bringing his large white hand to his chest. “Well, it's a long ride back to Sunnydale. We'd best be going.”


“Wait!” Angel shouted when they turned to leave. “You're not just going to leave me here like this, are you?”


“Sure we are. Your friends are probably just finding out that the call that I made was bogus. They'll be here soon.”


“Spike!” Angel yelled.


It was no use. He heard the underground entrance door slam shut and then there was just silence.


He didn't want his friends to see him like this. With all his might, he fought his bindings, but to no avail. Angel finally gave up with a frustrated growl and relaxed as best he could. He looked at his erect cock and then wished he hadn't. It was red and engorged and having seen it, it was now even more painful.


There was nothing to do but wait for the crew to return, and he could only hope that Gunn or Wes would find him and not Cordelia.


He was going to kill Spike when he got free. But the idea of the Buffybot intrigued him. He might just take that for himself. A wicked, Angelus like smile crept over his face. He could have a lot of fun with that and because it wasn't really his Buffy, he wouldn't lose his soul. She'd whipped that belt around like and expert.


Angel jerked with a guilty start when he heard his friends enter the lobby.


“Gunn!” he yelled, trying to keep the hysteria from creeping into his voice. “I could use your help.”


He rolled his eyes when they all came running.


Cordelia gasped, but grinned and added an, “Oh, my, God.” Then she turned on the balls of her feet and left the office.


Great. Just great!”


Gunn and Wes laughed as they untied him.


“You're going to have to take care of that by yourself though,” Gunn said through his snorts. “How in the hell did you end up trussed up like a Christmas turkey in your own office?”


“It's long story,” Angel groused, standing up and turning his back on them while he gingerly released his manhood from the ring and zipped his pants up.


“I swear, Angel,” Wes said, still grinning. “We can't leave you alone for a minute.”


Comments

Posted by: Speaker-to-Customers ([info]speakr2customrs)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 06:58 am (UTC)
Dolphin of Approval

Hilarious!

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 12:18 pm (UTC)

: ) Thank you.

Posted by: Jamie ([info]jaded_jamie)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 07:58 am (UTC)
Doctor Who - The 10th Doctor - Camp

Oh this is really funny. I really am enjoying this!

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 12:18 pm (UTC)

LOL! Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed.

Posted by: pfeifferpack ([info]pfeifferpack)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 10:35 am (UTC)
standing ovation

Oh this is priceless! I think the Bot might have a new home and lots of use if Angel has his way. This was just wonderfully funny and visual.


Very "evil" Spike...note perfect.

Excellent!

Kathleen

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 12:19 pm (UTC)

Thank you so much. I was focusing on getting Buffybot right that I worried about the other character voices being off, so I'm glad my Spike came out OK. :)

I'm so glad you liked it.

Posted by: pfeifferpack ([info]pfeifferpack)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 12:52 pm (UTC)

Oh yeah....your Spike is at his mischievous best here. Like when he went after the gem from Angel and like he was in AtS S5 when it came to poking at Angel's soft and vulnerable parts.....PERFECT!

Kathleen

Posted by: Elena ([info]moscow_watcher)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 11:07 am (UTC)
Hee

Terrific! To me, it's part of canon now.

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 12:20 pm (UTC)

LOL! Thank you. What a compliment. *hugs*

Posted by: chrislee ([info]chrisleeoctaves)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 11:37 am (UTC)
B/A/S

Even I, confirmed B/A shipper, had to laugh at this and I think it was because your Buffybot voice was so good. It was really cute.

I'd love to add it to Sublime if you're willing.

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 12:27 pm (UTC)

Hello there. I'm so glad you enjoyed it and sure, I'm willing to allow it to be added to an archive. I'm honored that you would ask.

If you like B/A, my first story (not my best work, so probably not worthy of an add in your archive) is Spike-centric but has a B/A pairing on the side.

It's called A Perfect Fit and can be found here: http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=dawnofme&keyword=A+perfect+fit&filter=all

Posted by: dragonflylady77 ([info]dragonflylady77)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 01:04 pm (UTC)
lollipop

It's so good I have to comment again!!
Love the title, love that Angel thinks it's Buffy even with the chains, and the cock ring and the duct tape...
Mwhahaha

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 05:04 pm (UTC)

LOL! Thank you.

Posted by: Velvet Rain Drops ([info]adriana_is)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 01:18 pm (UTC)
Ten Wink

Lovely!

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 05:04 pm (UTC)

:) Thank you.

Posted by: kudagirl ([info]kudagirl)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 01:29 pm (UTC)

With a cute little pout, she said, “Having a hard time getting it up? Spike thought that might happen. He's says it’s what happens when you get old and don't use it often.”

Your Buffybot voice is perfect and so funny. She was so sunny and hyper all the time. Funny stuff. Not surprised Angel would like a Buffybot of his own. LOL.

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 05:04 pm (UTC)

Thank you. I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

Posted by: lara beckinsale ([info]larabeckinsale)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 04:55 pm (UTC)

SO, so, so funny!! lol

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: September 12th, 2008 05:05 pm (UTC)

:) Thank you. I'm so glad you liked it.

Posted by: ((Anonymous))
Posted at: September 22nd, 2008 04:41 am (UTC)
hilarious!

ohmy...that's hilarious. Buffybot always cracks me up!
A

Posted by: The Anti-OTP ([info]snowpuppies)
Posted at: December 10th, 2008 07:16 pm (UTC)

“Angel is ugly and his hair sticks up funny. And now, his cock does, too.”

This totally made me LOL.

I've no idea why I've not friended you before now. I shall have to poke through your fics soonish. :)

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: December 10th, 2008 07:29 pm (UTC)

I'm so glad I could make you laugh. I'll be glad to have you as a friend. I'm an improving writer so my stories are semi-good at best. :) I welcome con-crit on any of them.

Posted by: The Anti-OTP ([info]snowpuppies)
Posted at: December 10th, 2008 07:37 pm (UTC)

Well, I imagine they're a bit more than semi-good. ;) But you're right that one can always get better. :)

Posted by: annegables ([info]annegables)
Posted at: December 22nd, 2008 05:14 am (UTC)

This is absolutely priceless and the weird part is that I could totally see Spike doing this. Maybe it's a behind the scenes thing that actually went on and we just weren't told about it?? Seriously though, do you think there is a chance you would ever write up a story of Angel getting a Buffybot? An Angel/Buffybot series where she is worked into some of the Angel episodes? Sorry to bother you - just thought this could be the start of something beautiful!

Posted by: hello_spikey ([info]hello_spikey)
Posted at: April 22nd, 2009 07:39 pm (UTC)

Dude! Spike so should have done that.

heee heeeeeee

*snicker*

Posted by: dawnofme ([info]dawnofme)
Posted at: April 22nd, 2009 08:43 pm (UTC)

:) I think so too. Thanks for reading.

Posted by: Karla ([info]charmingkarla)
Posted at: April 29th, 2009 04:23 am (UTC)

lolllllllllll I am crying my eyes out here!!!!! great job :)

Posted by: Kumi ([info]just_kumi)
Posted at: September 3rd, 2009 01:29 am (UTC)
Kitty Spangel

Angel is ugly and his hair sticks up funny. And now, his cock does, too

Oh! My! Good. I've never laughed so hard. I can definitely see Angel being this much of a moron. Led around by his dick as usual.

Edited at 2009-09-03 01:58 am (UTC)

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